The comedian Jeff Foxworthy has a great routine called "You Might Be a Redneck." He sets up a series of questions, and if you answer yes, well, you might be a... You get the idea.
But during this convention season, perhaps a more penetrating question is: Are you a bad citizen? Let's be truthful, there are millions of Americans who don't care about their country at all. How can you tell? Easy. If an American does not pay attention to national events or educate himself enough to know the basics of how the USA works, then he or she is a bad citizen.
I do believe the good citizens far outnumber the bad, but those millions of derelict Americans do the country harm. First off, their vote (if they even bother) is most likely uninformed, which gives charlatan politicians an easier time of it. And many bad citizens are simply lazy, meaning they often fail in the competitive marketplace and must rely on those who prosper to support them, at least in part. Simply put, slackers drain strength from any country.
So here is a short quiz in case you are in doubt as to what comprises a bad citizen. You are a bad citizen if:
-- You can't explain the three branches of government.
-- You can't name 10 former presidents.
-- You don't know who the current vice president is.
-- You don't know who issued the Emancipation Proclamation or what it is.
-- You can't explain why World War II started.
-- You don't know where Vietnam is.
-- You can't name 15 foreign countries.
-- You think Jimmy Carter was a great president.
-- You believe the Founding Fathers would support banning handguns.
-- You think Americans invented pizza.
There are approximately 320 million Americans, and every one over the age of 12 should be able to answer those questions. There is simply no excuse if you can't. You are a bad citizen.
But if you fall into that category, there is something you can hold onto. In their wisdom, the Founding Fathers designed a Constitution that gives every single citizen the absolute right to be a moron. No one can force you to pay attention to current events, learn history or understand how the USA became the greatest country in the world.
And believe me, America's greatness was achieved despite the presence of bad citizens. They were simply overwhelmed by the good folks: the people who respect their country enough to pay attention to it.
Veteran TV news anchor Bill O'Reilly is host of the Fox News show ''The O'Reilly Factor.'' Visit his website at www.billoreilly.com. For archived columns, go to www.gwinnettdailypost.com/billoreilly.