procrastinate to put off doing (something unpleasant or burdensome) until a future time; to postpone (such actions) habitually
Hello. My name is Todd and I'm a procrastinator. I know this doesn't surprise a lot of you because you're also in the club. And I look forward to seeing you if we ever get around to having a meeting.
I'm not sure why I'm bothering to write this considering club members will likely never get around to reading it. But in this business there are lots of deadlines, so it seemed like a good idea to explore a topic that has brought me smack-dab against this one.
Call it the "Manifestation of procrastination," or in my case "How Wednesday morning becomes Monday afternoon." Call it anything you want (a good procrastinator would make a long list and check it at least twice), just understand that while procrastination is not a disease, it certainly can be a curse.
Just ask the guy next to you, the one who likes to doodle and stack his paper clips instead of finishing his spread sheet. Or the lady who sits by the front window, allowing her to chart the number of white cars versus blue cars that have entered the parking lot this month.
Both are good forms of procrastination, but neither holds a candle to the group variety. Whether it's avoiding filling out an expense report by discussing the meaning of "Lost" or putting off an important call by making fun of Britney Spears' soon-to-be ex-husband, procrastination loves company. The more the merrier, which is how the saying "tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week" came about.
But why? Why do seemingly intelligent individuals prolong the inevitable? Why do well-educated folks knowingly paint themselves into a corner? How does Wednesday morning become Monday afternoon?
Alleviation of pressure is the quick answer. The act (some may say art) of procrastination takes pressure that is on you today and transfers it to tomorrow. That the pressure is merely delayed, not eradicated, seems to be lost on procrastinators, who unlike James Bond fans seem to forget that "Tomorrow Never Dies."
Being a dues-paying member of the club, it's not surprising that I've put off explaining my own procrastination until this paragraph. Why, you might ask, is it so difficult to hit deadline for a weekly column?
Well, it appears in Tuesday's paper, so Tuesday is out. Have to recharge your battery. Now we're at Wednesday morning, which brings a big weekly meeting. From there Wednesday afternoon turns into Thursday without much help and Thursday features an extra afternoon meeting that quickly leads to Friday.
And everyone knows you can't turn in something on Friday that isn't due until Monday afternoon. They kick you out of the club for stunts like that.
Monday morning means more paperwork, and before I know it I'm back to Monday afternoon wondering how I'll finish my doodling and discussions about Kevin Federline with the deadline for this column staring me straight in the face.
But I made it, and you know how? By writing about this topic, which I planned to write about two weeks ago.
Like Mark Twain said: "Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow."
Todd Cline can be reached via e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org. His column appears on Tuesdays.
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